


Stay With Me

by Redribbonhood



Category: Dragon Age: Origins
Genre: F/M, Mutual Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-07
Updated: 2018-05-07
Packaged: 2019-05-03 10:29:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,719
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14567052
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Redribbonhood/pseuds/Redribbonhood
Summary: There are times when words fail. So after the archdemon is defeated, there are still things left unsaid between Sten and The Warden. There shouldn't be.





	Stay With Me

**Author's Note:**

> **Panahedan:** "Goodbye." Literally, "take refuge in safety."  
>  **Ataashi:** Dragon; literally "glorious one(s)."  
>  **Bas:** Often used as a neutral term to describe non-Qunari people  
>  **Basalit-an:** A non-Qunari worthy of respect.  
>  **Vashedan:** A common profanity.

**Act I**

**“Where is the cake? I was told there would be cake? The cake is a lie…”**  Sten grumbles to himself as the newly proclaimed Hero of Ferelden approaches him. There are many nobles in attendance- though they had soon realized she is not one for words. They have appropriately left her alone to attain details of the archdemon battle from her more verbose companions. Her pointed ears pick up the term “Ghost Warden” more than once amongst their conversations and she doubts her white hair and arcane magic are the origins of her new moniker. But she is not bothered. There are others in the room who value her reticence.

  
**“It is good to see you again, Kadan,”**  he says as he towers over her slight, elven frame.  
    
His greeting is familiar and carries the unspoken connotation,  _“I am glad you survived the battle._ ” The feeling is mutual and also goes without saying. There was a profound comfort in the quiet found between two silent types who understood each other. He seems livelier today, she notices, pleased. The Warden had wondered if the festivities might have seemed too trivial for her spartan friend but that does not seem to be the case. She maintains her usual stoic expression as he explains he will be soon returning to his people. The tightness in her chest is unfamiliar to her and Surana is once again at a loss for words.  
  
It didn’t make sense, not really. Her other companions have already told her likewise. Alistair had left them before the Battle of Denerim to prepare for his coronation, and more so to be away from her- the woman who had spared Loghain Mac Tir. True to her word, Morrigan had vanished shortly after the archdemon had been slain. Oghren was going to try and start a new life with Felsi, Zevran had “unfinished business” in Antiva, and even her closest friend and confidante, Leliana, had been summoned by her old mentor Mother Dorothea. Blue herself would have new responsibilities to attend to in the coming months at Vigil’s Keep. They would all be parting ways. Sten’s impending absence should not hurt any more than the others’. But it does.  
  
Blue Surana almost says something. The words “I could go with you if you like,” form themselves from somewhere outside her mind. They rise in the back of her throat before they are met with duty- and then struck down by reason. She does not offer for the same reason he does not ask. Even if she were not the new Warden Commander, with the monumental task of rebuilding Ferelden’s Grey Wardens, it could not be. Even if she was not a “woman who fights” or was willing to set aside Spellweaver for good, it was impossible. As a mage there would be no life worth living in Par Vollen.  
  
**“It will be difficult to travel alone…after so much time spent with companions,”** Sten chooses his words carefully. He does not mean to cause her pain, but from the flicker in her eyes, he discerns he has. Still, it must be said. He thanks her for his sword, his soul, and his life. He tells her of his departure in two days time and where she would be able to find him. She watches him in silence, face unreadable.  
  
**“Perhaps I shall see you again one day,”**  he says finally. **“Until then, may you always find the path you seek. Farewell, Kadan,”**  
  
**“Panahedan, Sten,”** her monotone is soft. A few nobles nearby look over at them, startled but intrigued. They are now curious at her ability to actually speak. But their prying eyes are ignored. Sten turns to leave and Blue lets him because she knows well that whatever he does it will always be for his people. It is senseless for her to ask anything more of him, just as it is selfish for him to ask what he wants of her.  
  
Still, the unspoken plea lingers on both their lips long after he’s out of sight:  _“Stay with me,”_

\--------

**Act II**

 Sten does not see the Warden for the next two days. He goes about the city making necessary purchases for the long voyage. He does not know that in her absence she scours every library in Denerim for books on the Qun and Qunari culture. Sten spends his nights and takes his meals at the arl’s estate with the rest of the companions who have not yet departed. They are grateful for the continued hospitality and casually wonder where the Warden has vanished to. On the second night Loghain says something about Surana being down in the dungeon hacking away at the archemon’s corpse. They disregard this as a jest.

 The next morning he does not expect to see her at the docks. But the elf mage never fails to surprise him. She is there before dawn waiting for him and they walk in silence towards the merchant ship he has booked passage on. She walks beside him closer than usual, her lithe arms brushing against his every once in a while. The early morning air is cold, especially so being close to the ocean, but they both seem to know this is not the reason for the proximity. Whether she slipped her small hand in his or he gently took hers as they brushed past each other in stride, they do not know. But she holds his hand the rest of the way until they reach the ramp of the ship. Several sailors pass them carrying heavy cargo.

 _“There are times when words fail,”_ he’d once said to her, and now as the sun begins to peak over the horizon she is glad he understands. As they stand together looking up at the ship she suddenly turns to him, blue eyes studying him intently. There is not a single scar or hair or feature of him she is willing to forget. He speaks first because he already has each detail of her face memorized.

 **“What is your wish, Kadan?”** he asks for the last time.

 She removes her hand from his and reaches into her satchel, removing a small package wrapped in cloth and twine. Blue hands it to him without explanation and inclines her head slightly towards the boat as the crew calls for final boarding.

 **“You,”** the mage says solemnly once the Qunari is on board and the ship pulls from port. He watches her from the top of the deck and though she is certain he cannot hear her, she wrestles the words from her tongue. They are much easier to say now as the ship takes him away. **“My wish is you.”**

 The sun is almost fully over the water and as the ship sails towards the horizon, she squints at the light. She can no longer see him but she finds she cannot look away. Blue Surana reaches under her cloak and runs her fingers over the newly made necklace hanging there. The words she’d been practicing the last two days of studying and crafting finally slip out.

**“Stay with me.”**

\---------   

**Act III**

 The Warden, being an elf and female, has always looked small to him- but never more so than now as she becomes a dot on the docks. Sten watches her stoically as the ship takes him further and further away. The warmth of her hand still lingers in his as he unwraps the small package. Ah.

 A dragon’s tooth.  A hole is drilled into the top and a thin rope cord run through. He knows what this is, what it might mean, and the origin of this particular tooth without explanation. He’s heard of such... gifts, part of an old practice from before the reformations of the Qun; and he had been at her side when she’d dealt the killing blow against the archdemon. The dark tooth was unmistakable, even cut in half as it was. Still, Sten frowns, conflicting feelings rising up within him. The Warden cannot possibly know the meaning behind such a gift. Surely, she hadn't even known the meaning of the word “Kadan”. He frowns. Or had she?

  He has often underestimated her in the past and she, without fail, has always exceeded his expectations. This time, he soon learns, is no different. He reads the short message on the attached slip of parchment and the uncertainties are quelled within him. A sense of understanding sets in, but also..something else. Now he is concerned. Somehow she has learned of the outdated tradition no longer practiced. Back when his people were allowed to indulge in such sentimentality, many years ago when ataashi were plentiful. It would not be allowed for him to keep such a token now, especially not from a bas.

 Years of ingrained disciplined make his hand reach out, instinctively, over the ship’s hand-railing. He dangles the necklace over the eager waves. Something else makes him tighten his grip. For the first time in years he struggles against the demands of the Qun. He recites the doctrine in his head, attempting to convince his hand into letting go: _“Struggle is an illusion. The tide rises, the tide falls, but the sea is changeless. There is nothing to struggle against…”_

  In the middle of his contemplation, the words of the old Qunari books he’d read as a young man resound, louder: “A symbol of glorious devotion, signifying no matter how far apart life takes a bonded pair... they are always together.”

 _ **“Vashedan,”**_ he curses, pulling his hand back and holding the necklace to the center of his chest.

 Later he tells himself he keeps the necklace out of debt toward the Warden, in return for what she'd done for him during the blight. Even later, when he’s amongst his people again, the necklace hangs around his neck hidden safely under his tunic and he convinces himself it is allowed. He keeps it out of respect for a basalit-an, and nothing more. Years go by and Sten is named Arishok. The cord has worn away but he keeps the tooth hidden under his armor at all times. He has long since lost the parchment but its concise message he has never forgotten. He keeps her wish like an oath: “Stay with me.”.

 

**_Fin._ **

**Author's Note:**

> "If you connot hold me in your arms, then hold my memory in high regard. And if I cannot be in your life, then at least let me live in your heart," - Ranata Suzuki
> 
> Thanks for reading! :) Please let me know what you think! Blue Surana is my OC Warden who almost never talks in my canon. She is different from the other Surana written in the requested [kiss prompt](https://archiveofourown.org/works/14543991)


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